WHAT PRICE DO YOU PUT ON JOY?
Do you think you have to spend a lot of money in order to experience joy? Maybe you think it’s the price of a spa day or a luxury car.
I think joy can be really cheap or free. You just have to notice it. Today, I experienced an abundance of joy while eating watermelon. I love watermelon. It makes me think of summer and warmth and playing outside or laying on a beach. I felt so much joy in that moment. Price tag? Five dollars (I do live in NYC and it was a seedless watermelon!) While that might sound like a lot to pay for watermelon, I think it’s a bargain to pay for joy. It’s something I can keep enjoying after already having paid the cost.
What’s your watermelon? Is there something you’ve been depriving yourself of because you think it’s too expensive for what it is? What if you reframe it in terms of how much joy it brings you? Would it still seem too pricey?
You don’t have to spend a lot of money to feel joy. In fact, simply allowing yourself to do something that brings you joy can have the same effect. Do you love to draw? Play the piano? Build a puzzle? How much time seems to be “too much for that.” Is it still too much if it brings you an abundance of joy?
Sometimes we rule things out based on their face value instead of how they actually make us feel. We also sometimes hold on to things way longer than we need to because of their face value (think CD player or those pants your mom always told you would come back in style).
In both cases of money and time, we’re not spending frivolously or throwing out valuables, but we are taking our feelings into consideration. We’re also not ignoring our responsibilities just for the sake of joy. But if we can keep joy in mind when we’re shopping, thinking about how to spend our time, or while cleaning, we might realize that joy doesn’t have to feel so costly after all.
How To Find Your Watermelon And Experience More Joy:
Ask yourself, what’s something you’ve done before that made you feel true joy, even just for a few moments?
Think experiences - watching a sunset, squirrels running around, dog playing fetch, rain drops, favorite playlist, hand lotion, coffee or tea
Do activities - making something crafty, knitting, board games, reading, writing, painting, playing an instrument, stretching, singing (no one says it has to sound good :) it just has to feel good)
Use your senses - look at something pleasant either in person or online (kittens, puppies, beaches, stars), listen to something funny or inspiring, eat or drink something tasty, smell your soap/body wash/shampoo or go outside and smell literal roses/grass/rain, touch something you like (fuzzy blanket, smooth rock from that trip you took, ridges in an old toy)
Notice how you feel doing these things. Notice your thoughts, how your body feels, and what emotions come up for you. Is there joy? Is there something else?
If you found your joy, make a note of what it is, and try to do it for 5-10 minutes. Give yourself permission to do something just for joy, just for this allotted period of time. If you have more time you can always do it longer, but if you only have 30 seconds, make it the most joyous 30 seconds you can!
I am Dr. Alice Rizzi, a psychologist in New York City and Brooklyn. I specialize in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for anxiety, stress, and OCD. Contact me today to feel better and achieve your goals!